Revolutionary

My current occupation: ridding my life of excess clutter (yeah, I know that was redundant) and unnecessary items (and so was that).

What I’m realizing is that there is a lot of the stuff that I’ve held onto to keep from offending family, forgetting friends, or remembering how much money I’ve wasted on possessions. Moving in with Jess is forcing me to reevaluate what I really need, value, or have a use for. Those two George Foreman-type grills that Nano gave me on her Equip-My-Granddaughter’s-Kitchen-So-She-Will-Be-A-Good-Homemaker campaign of 2005 are now going to homes that will actually open them, as will the smoothie maker, the extra egg-slicer, and the metal spoon rest. I am getting rid of an 18” anorexic ballerina figurine my other Grandma mail-ordered as a centerpiece for my coffee table, all of the guitar supplies that I will never use since the instrument itself is gone, and every last bobby pin I find in the apartment that’s not in the bathroom.

Are you ready for the best part? I am throwing out all of the dating advice books I’ve held onto because they were gifts. I don’t care how many of my friends swore by it or how long it was at the top of some Christianity Today Bestseller List.

I am 24 years old and this is my public announcement: People, now is not the time to be worried about my biological clock. It is too soon for you to start setting me up on blind dates with childhood friends or continually remind me that “love is worth the wait.” Most importantly, I have no intention of reading or re-reading any of the following that have been on my shelf out of guilt for far too long now:

When God Writes Your Love Story: The Ultimate Approach to Guy/Girl Relationships

Boy Meets Girl: Say Hello to Courtship

Boundaries in Dating: Making Dating Work

5 Paths to the Love of Your Life: Defining Your Dating Style

How to Get a Date Worth Keeping: Be Dating in Six Months or Your Money Back

I Kissed Dating Goodbye

and finally…

If I am waiting on God, then What am I Doing in a Christian Chat room: Confessions of a Do-It-Yourself Single

Classy, I know. The point is that they’re not me, and now they don’t belong to me!

Welcome to the Conquering the “I Can’ts” Revolution. Today’s mantra will be “I CAN rid myself of things that other people use to define me.”